emotional purity

Growing up in church, I've heard about purtiy...a lot. About every year or so we go through at least one sex series and talk about "how far is too far" and how to have a "pure" relationship. All these things are very important, and extremely relevant to people's lives. However, I strongly feel that we overlook a HUGE part of purity that I feel is just as important as physical purity...and that is emotional purity. I see it all the time...two people start dating...they've grown up in church...they've had purity engrained into their minds...they know how far they're supposed to go. They wait and wait and wait to kiss...again...all good things. But...instead of making out...they spend their time talking for hours and sharing all about their hurts and struggles, family problems, past relationships...they become best friends...learn to trust each other, they express their love for each other, spend all their time together, they know each other inside and out...they get close with each others family, and soon learn to depend on each other as a support and refuge for lifes struggles...and then...it ends.

Now, they not only have to deal with the loss of a boyfriend...but also the loss of a best friend...a family, a support, counselor, etc. They may not have given themselves away physically...but emotionally...they've given everything. They are left broken and confused..."I thought it would last forever". This is because they never knew what emotional purity was all about.

I believe that when you get married you should give yourself physically for the first time...I also believe God desires us to save our emotional body for our spouse as well. So, we need to do what we can to keep our emotional well-being in tact so as not to become an emotional wreck for our husbands/ wives.

So how do you stay emotional pure? Physical purity is somewhat easy to preach (not easy to do)...but emotional purity is more ambiguous. Here are some things I think can help.

1. Don't say I love you. If you're in high school there's a 98% chance that you don't actually love the person you are with...and a 96% chance that you don't know what love is. For more information on this...read Kelsey's Blog or watch the Nooma video called flame.

2. Keep your friends. Don't hang out with your friends much less. Self-explanatory.

3. Don't make your boyfriend/girlfriend your best friend. There is no reason for him/her to know your secrets... tell your friends/small group about the struggles in your life... And it's impossible to be "accountability partners" with your significant other...so don't pretend to try.

4. Don't let yourself, or your friends fantasize about the future. DO NOT talk about marriage until you are ready to be engaged. If you are in high school marriage shouldn't even be in your vocabulary...unless you are talking about your parents. Don't let your friends tell you how cute your babies will be or pick out your bridesmaids dresses...just don't. All this does is put extra pressure on the relationship and bring expectations into it that can't be fulfilled. You will be let down.

5. Be Independent... Don't make plans based on a relationship...that, I'm sorry, won't last...don't pick your college, career, ministry, or senior prom date based on the relationship you're in now. Do what is right for YOU.

6. Remember that you were created for the purpose of glorifying God...not a person. You were put on earth for God's pleasure...don't be a boyfriend pleaser.

Let's face it, boys are physical, and girls are emotional...we know this. So if girls need to help out our brother's physical purity by being modest and wearing one-piece bathing suits at camp...then boys need to help girls maintain their emotional purity. This means...don't bring up things like marriage and love and all that stuff unless you're ready to marry us...which you're not. And don't joke about liking us when it's not true.

Ok, I'm sorry this is so long...I have a lot to say on this subject. Thanks for reading...let me know what you think too.

And, if you're in high school...I recommend reading "Dateable". Even if you're not...read it anyway.

I'll leave you with this, "Above all else, guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life" Proverbs 4:23

So...

So...........I realized that I start almost every blog with "so..."

so...I'm gonna work on that.

My apologies.

I'm sorry...

so...I sounded a little harsh last night. I too am an idiot and have done many idiot things in my life. I hope being taken to jail helps them to not make idiot decisions in the future.

With Grace...

Alanna

I'm sorry, but I don't really feel bad for idiots.

So...I come home tonight at about 1:30 or so...and there's 2 cop cars on my street with lights flashing...this is the second night in a row that the people next door had a party...parents are out of town...you know. My mom is a bit nosy and convinced me to go out on the balcony with her to find out what's going on. Not one of my prouder moments...but it was worth it when parents started coming to pick up their kids. This dad that came to pick up his daughter was Mr. Calm and Collected until they were done talking to the cops...then he unleashed on his 15 year old drunk skanky daughter. BTW...she's not allowed to get her license, and she's on lock-down and is BUSTED. I know this because he yelled it at a decibel level that exceeded that of the party, I'm sure. It was awesome! See...call me insensitive, but I don't really feel all that bad for the poor girl. If your gonna be 15, show up at a party, get wasted, start a fight and get the cops called on you...I think I'd rather you not have your license either.

But the best part was that my mom called the house...#1 to make sure everyone was ok, cuz the kid that lives next door was being handcuffed and put in the cop car...and #2 cuz she's nosy, and #3 she wanted to make sure they didn't think SHE was the one who called the cops...oh my mom...gotta love her. Anyway, turns out they called the cops cuz a fight broke out or something...my mom talked to the very intoxicated older brother (with 2 broken ribs apparently) who's like 25...and who BTW got my mom's cell number from the phone call...how awesome would it be if he drunk dialed my mom later? Oh... I hope it happens.

BARFship 2000

So...I went to the fair tonight. I hadn't been in a couple years and I was really looking forward to a cinnamon roll and photo booths. Neither of which I partook in this evening...due to one ride, Starship 2000. You know this ride. You've probably been on this ride. It's the one that like a spinny top that you go inside and it spins so fast that the centrifugal force pins you against the wall so you can go upside down and crawl around but you are pretty much immobile.

So...we went on it once...and it was very fun...so, we took a breather and decided to give it another whirl (I'm lame). The second time around we went nuts...I was trying to take pictures but my arm kept getting pinned down...then I look over at Alli and she's sitting Indian Style (oh I'm sorry that's not PC anymore...criss-cross applesauce) with this look on her face like she's in more pain than she's ever been in as her whole body is getting compressed into the wall. I swear this ride has to be a detriment to your health. When the ride ends and we all slide back to the ground, I happen to be facing the wall (which makes you drool, BTW) and my necklace gets caught in the side and I almost choke...thanks Shea for saving my life.

I have a really strong stomach and I never get motion sickness...maybe a headache on Star Tours, but that's it. But let me tell you, I've never felt so sick and weird. I was in a daze and wanted to make myself throw up just to feel better. Needless to say, I did not get to eat ANYTHING on a stick...or a cinnamon roll because of Barfship 2000. Although I did take a gander at the craft fair and it made me realize how talented I am...cuz that stuff was embarrassing.

So, bottom line...one trip on the Starship 2000 is plenty.

I don't think I could ever be a hairstylist...

SO...I got my hair done today.

Although I think it'd be fun to learn how to cut and color and style hair...kind of an artsy thing...I just really don't think that I could be a hairstylist. Although, I'm an extrovert...(i think that's why I'm nocturnal BTW) and I'm fairly outgoing, I just don't think I could make conversation all day long with people I don't know...especially when they don't really engage in conversation. The girl who does my hair is my friend from growing up so it's not that awkward...but the stylist next to us was painfully trying to engage her client in conversation. Eh. Superficial conversations all day long...no thanks.

I think I'd like to learn the art of making good conversation.

God is good...all the time...

This is my little brother Dustin. He's turning 2 this week. I honestly can't believe it's been two years since we adopted him. I can't believe it's been two years since my mom text messaged me while I was away and told me I had a new brother. It's so weird...part of me thought it was too good to be true. My mom sends a letter to an adoption agency and a month later there's a baby in our house. When it all was happening...there was a part of me that thought it wasn't going to work out. But last month we got his birth certificate...and he's two now.

God is so good. I was reading Joshua (as in the Bible) a while ago and after the Isrealites cross the Jordan (before they make the booty drop like the walls of jericho)...Joshua tells them to take stones from the bottom of the dry riverbed and pile them up as a memorial. That way when their children asked what the memorial was, they would remember what miracles the Lord had done in their lives. Well...Dustin is like my pile of rocks. He's that thing that reminds me that the Lord is good...and that He is faithful...and that He does miracles in my life.

I will be celebrating the Lord's goodness at Chuck. E. Cheese's on Saturday for Dustin's 2nd birthday...and probably tasting the Lord's goodness too...in some pizza and cinnamon sticks.

Mat Kearney tricked me...

So at Student Leadership I listened to the radio for the first time in months and months...and this song came on called "Nothing left to lose". I swear to you, I thought it was Chris Martin singing. I mean everything in my body told me it must have been a new Coldplay song...to the point where I was arguing with Logan over whether or not it was Chris Martin. So I researched it and discovered it was NOT Chris Martin...but was this guy named Mat Kearney. Since I love Coldplay...i figured he'd be super good.

I got the CD...and let me tell you...that Mat Kearny is one tricky sonofagun.

Let me just say that the rest of the CD sounds more like Fort Minor, that sucky white rapper guy, than Coldplay. I mean...he ruins every song by "rapping". It just figures that he would release the one song on his album that isn't a total joke. So I feel tricked. Very sneaky Mat....you got me.

Actually, this reminds me a lot of how I felt when I was in San Francisco in November, and I got tricked into losing $60 to a street performer. It actually is a really sore subject. I cried. Ok...I don't even want to blog about it.

Luckily...the term, "I got the CD"...means that Taylor found it in HSM...so I didn't actually have to pay for it. But I'm sure that there is someone out there who did purchase the CD and then realized they'd been hustled...and the little fuzzy ball was indeed not under the cup they KNEW it was under....ugggh...i need to sleep before I cry again.

Goodnight all...

And goodnight Mat...I hope you can't sleep at night, knowing what you've done.

Our Story

"Is the greatest truth about Adam and Eve and the fruit that it happened or that it happens?...Their story is true for us because it happened and because it happens. It is an accurate description of how life is. The reason the stories in the Bible have resonated with so many people over the years is that they have seen themselves in these stories.

Here's another example: The Isrealites leave the kingdom of Egypt where they are slaves, and God brings them out into freedom.

It happens.

Everyday.

...This is why the Bible is still so powerful. These ancient stories are our stories."

I read that in Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell months ago...but recently I have found a new and deeper appreciation for those words. In my small group with my high school girls we are reading through Exodus...and I can't tell you how much it is speaking to me. I mean I've known the story of Exodus, even read it, I've seen the Prince of Egypt and all...but never before have I resonated so much with it. It truly is my story! Lately I've been feeling like the only reason Moses ever lived was so that he could tell my story.

I was once a slave. I felt trapped. Finding myself in a situation that no matter how hard I tried to get myself out of it...it still held me captive. I begged and pleaded for God to free me from it.

"The Isrealites cried out from their burden of slavery. They cried out for help, and their pleas for deliverance rose up to God. God heard their cries and remembered his covenant...He looked down on the Isrealites and felt deep concern for their welfare." (Exodus 2:23-24) I can remember that point in my story...when God looked down on me and had great concern and compassion for me and decided to free me.

It's wierd...each time I read Exodus, Pharoah represents something else to me. Sometimes I think he's the devil, sometimes I think he's sin...and sometimes I think he's me. Today...he is me. I read about the plagues today...and today Pharoah is me. When I think back on when God decided to free me...it took a long time before I actually was free...(in some ways and some days, I'm still not). The reason it is a process for me is because it was a process for the Isrealites...because Pharoah wouldn't let them go. Pharoah is me. I wouldn't let myself free...my old self...the one afraid of losing control of the situation. So God persuaded me, and it didn't feel so good. God sent "blood, and frogs, and gnats, and flies, and hail and locust...etc; and I reacted much like Pharoah did...at first I passed these things "signs", "feelings", off as nothing more than me...attested them to anything else BUT God...then, when He got more persuasive, I gave in, conceded to let God have His way, to free myself and give up control. BUT...the second he let up, I forced myself right back into slavery (I wish you could read my journals to see how true this is). The Bible is ridiculous in how true it is!

"And when they realized that the Lord had seen their misery and was deeply concerned for them, they all bowed their heads and worshiped" (Exodus 4:31) When I think about my story of deliverance and freedom...the only appropriate response I can have is to fall down in worship. That's what worship is. It's my response to God's concern for me. There's nothing else I can do but worship Him.

That's all for now...I'm sure there's more to come.

Competition

I can blow a bigger bubble-gum bubble than you...

try me.

Especially if you are Taylor Ishii...cuz I can do everything better than him.

the boy of my dreams is legal now.

today when I was cleaning out my room, I found a picture of me and the famous Jett Jackson. I just thought I'd share that to make you all a little bit jealous. When I met him I was probably 20 and he was probably 17...but now he's 21 probably. So I should probably give him a call.

nocturnal and hot

So...I never thought I'd say this...but I'm pretty much ready for fall. I'm sick of sweating...especially at night. I haven't been able to sleep lately cuz its been so bloody hot in my room at night. So, I may have found the solution. You may be thinking...buy a fan. Well I don't like taking the easy way out...so I decided that the simple solution to the problem would be to rearrange ALL the furniture in my room so that my bed is right next to the window. It was a long day...BUT...so far I'm not sweating. But...my bed is also sharing a wall with my brother's crib...this could be bad. Luckily I'm the deepest sleeper on the planet. I may be nocturnal...but once I'm out...I'm OUT. I really think I have a sleeping disorder. I sleep through everything...the thunderstorm last night...Northridge earthquake...in fact...I've lived my whole life in california...and I don't think I've ever been awake for an earthquake...only aftershocks...oh...except for this one time when my dad was out of town and there was a big earthquake...I must have been in 3rd grade or something...anyway...my mom kinda freaked out...and woke me and my brother up and made us go stand in the middle of the street. It may have been the first time I realized that my mom didn't know everything...I just remember thinking, "Mom, we are supposed to stand in the doorway...not in the street in between two huge light poles."

And that brings me to my next digression...I need to move out of my house. Any suggestions?

the only trilogy i like is the trinity...and that doesn't count

So, I saw Pirates tonight...and i wasn't disappointed with the movie like most were...rather, I was disappointed with myself. Although I knew it was part of a trilogy...I forgot how ANGRY the part two of every trilogy makes me. I was so mad when the credits started rolling...cuz I truly didn't expect it to end at all...and I'm a moron. So conclusion...part twos of trilogies are soooooo frustrating...it's like ending the story right after Jesus dies...I think I'm on to something. But for now...I have to pack, goodnight.

highlight of the day....

Hayden fell into a cactus....and although I had to spend the following 45 minutes picking each spine out of his skin...it was well worth it. So funny.

the Lord wants me to be rich

I never ever have been a person to ever say, "I want to be rich when I grow up." But...this weekend I've been house-sitting...and not only has it been good to have a place to myself...I have THIS view to wake up to. So as I was laying out, with the cool breeze and beautiful scenery...I had an epiphany...the Lord wants me to be rich, cuz how much closer would I be to Him if I had this view everyday of my life? I think I'd be a better Christian if I were filthy rich...that whole camel through the eye of a needle thing...yeah right. I don't buy it.

BTW...(by the way)...I'm 96% kidding.


But I don't want to live in a sweet house like this if I'm by myself...cuz I'm a little scared being here all alone....there's so many windows! I know, I know, how old am I?

Dreams Come True

So...i had a dream come true today. Some may make fun of me...I'm a nerd...it's true. But I got to go to Club 33 at Disneyland. Some of you may not know what this is...it's a club that only allows 400 members at a time...and costs a butt-load of money each year to join...and anyway...Being a total disney-history nerd...it's always been my dream to go there. There's a inconspicuous door next to the Blue Bayou with a 33 sign...and there's this doorbell there...and i've always wanted to ring it and have it be answered and be invited in. It's been a childhood fantasy I guess..much like for some it would be to see their favorite sports team play or better yet...sit in the dugout and hang out in the locker room.

So...it was really sweet..really expensive...but REALLY sweet...all you can eat delicious foods and desserts...the bathroom may have been the best part. The toilet was like a chair...anyway...and they give you an endless supply of evian water...in fact there was this little asian dude...whose entire job was to make sure that my glass of Evian water was always topped off.

We made a joke at our table..."evian water, $4...delicious lunch buffet, $don't ask, being able to gloat to your friends and others that you got to go to Club 33...priceless." Lame...I know. But then I thought about it as I was up on the patio watching people at the park who weren't allowed to come in...what is it in us that desires so badly to be a part of something exclusive? To know that I get to do something that others don't...I mean we all had childhood clubs where we wouldn't let certain people in...it just seems so silly...but we all do it...you know you do. I mean...isn't that what gossip is all about...I know something you don't know. I'm sure it comes down to insecurities formed from not being in the childhood clubs or not being invited to birthday parties...but I'm sure thats a whole 'nother blog.

But...for now...I'm glad that my childhood fantasy became real.

Nocturnal

So, I'm nocturnal. This has been established. What better use for insomnia is there than creating a blog? Can't think of one at the moment. In fact...if I could think of a better use of my time...I'd probably be partaking in THAT activity instead. So here's the first of the many late night blogs.

Oh...and if you are going to be reading my nocturnal blogs...one thing you will need to get used to...i use a lot of ellipses...you know...the dot dot dots...it's just the way I think...you'll learn to love it.

One more thing...I hope you appreciate the cleverness in my blog title...I know Allison Hibbard would.

Goodnight...hopefully.